...for the next few days, for reasons I will explain later! Nothing sinister.
A compo might be fun, first prize is a bottle of finest Tuscan organic blah blah oil (I will allow repeat winners).
I am seeking a use for Gordon Brown once he gets booted, which cannot be long now. The use can be in the work environment (e.g. a call centre operative for an optician: "Hello - Vision Express, my name is Gordon, how can I help?") or possibly a physical use, say as a sketch-artists' living model for a historical book on the life of Cro-Magnon man. Or as a draught excluder. Or an extra on "Jackass III". You get the picture.
Enjoy, y'all.
Run for your lives… the ANTS ARE COMING!
1 hour ago
29 comments:
I think he should be sent to open a Christian Mission in Kandahar!!
T/T:
Welcome back!
The main use for Gordo (and Cherie for that matter) is to be a constant source of material for my blogette
Theo, is that the one from Indiana Jones and The Temple of Doom?
jh - a worthy and useful purpose indeed.
Working in a stable cleaning up Rocking Horse S..T !
Welcome back Tusc, you have been missed. xx
TB - very good.
I've missed doing the rounds of my favourite blogs, too. I think the perceived reality of the online blogging community concept is well worth a separate post (when I get home). Seems pretty real to me!
You're back then, Tony?
lj-r indeed, but in "lite" mode until later in the week when I return to the soaring rook-infested turrets of Tuscan Towers
Hitch ! Really !!!
I think Gordon Brown would make a goog bladder for a set of bagpipes. Dry, genuinely Scottish, plenty of loose skin and full of hot air.
Hitch, that imagery from your post was just too foul, so *poof*, it is gone!!! Will bring you over some clean oil, though.
E-K, yes, I can go with that, a bagpipe bladder. Isn't there a risk that he might be enjoying himself squeezing out all those dirges, though. I would suggest a tambourine - he can be pummelled and at the same time sound happy. What a nightmare for the man.
What better use for couple of hundred pounds of decomposing offal than to make haggis?
Further, the Splund has always thought that Jeremy Bentham must be frightfully lonely - maybe Gordon could be persuaded (with the aid of a piece of 2x4 with a nail through it) to keep him company, in a similar.. er... preserved condition.
Hmmm. The Haggis idea is a good one, but where are you planning to find a sheep's stomach of the magnitude to take such a quantity of the quivering flesh?
Just looked up Jeremy Bentham - what a loon, would fit right in to the present cabinet like the 8th pea in the pod.
Welcome back TT:-)
I thought GB was going to be commissioned by you and Nigella to do a series called "Cooking with Human Secretions"?? Hmmm, maybe I misunderstood.
BTW, If details about Fridays piss up are forthcoming, I am all ears!!
LJ - hope the camping was entertaining. The Friday thing didn' happen, due to (1)The Hitch being on the wagon and (2)me being up to my eyeballs in toil and work. I'm back for a social visit in 2 weeks time, will attempt to reschedule something for then.
The best job for him is to be 'employed' as Minister of Pensions - and kept there forever until every roosting chicken has pecked him to smithereens for his theft of billions.
On a lighter note, how about directing the next episode of 'No hiding place'?
BTW, Welcome back Tuscs!
(forgot my manners there...)
I think he should travel around the country, smiling at Civil Servants, in perpetuity.
Ahhh, I just saw you added me to your list! You're a sweetie, and I am honoured;-) xx
perhaps he can be in charge at the old politicians home...
or a stunt double for Donald Trump?
THe prize is mine ! I claim it !
TB - I think he would enjoy that too much, but I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you too;-)
scrobs, very good, but not quite in the league of your poetic oil-bearing effort of the other week.
Lilith - but what about the civil servants' health? ...oh, I see. Good plan!
Lady J mon plaisir!
Lady Mac - another fine entry with similar spin-off benefits to Lilith's
TB - don't count your Pekin Blues, m'dear!
Lady J - compo closes Sunday. Will review all entries and the judges decision will be final. Correspondence will be only entered into provided it is accompanied by banknotes.
With the death of poor old Backstairs Billy, perhaps a role could be found for the dread Cyclops mincing about downstairs at one of the royal palaces preparing G&Ts for his betters. I'm sure Giovanni Prescot could give him some tips.
Tusc: Pardon mah hignorance, àhm sure, but what t`eck is a Pekin Blue, Is it a rare breed of Chicken perchance ?
Sooo glad you`re back, I`ve been struggling to keep Electro, Hitch and Mutley in check, in your absence !
Hope the Tuscana, Little Imps and Woody are pleased to see you. xx
Oops, Just read your latest post and it seems that I have welcomed you back to Tuscan Towers prematurely Tusc.
I wonder what kind of welcome the Little Imps and Woody ae planning for you ?
Splund, I wanted to post on backstairs Billy (hmmm) but am too weakened to do so.
TB, yes indeedy, a fine looking bantam beastie it is. Thanks for the note, will be back firing on all cylinders Sunday. I suspect the Woody welcome will be un-necessarily emotional, the Tuscana with a "touch of frost" after seeing my legal lady eaglet pic...!
Tusc: I`m sure a visit to the the Tuscana`s favourite Jewellers for a trinket or two will suffice in ensuring the warmest of welcomes !
I think Messrs Gilbert & Sullivan rather beat you to this idea with their "I've got a little list and I'm sure they'll not be missed" ditty.
pS My septic tank could do with agood clean..
Strap him to the front of an Army Land Rover in Afghanistan, like the figurehead on a ship of the line.
Give him a meal and some water every time he draws fire.
I win.
Please send the oil to Mrs Killem. She got plenty use for this.
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